Frolic Log Week 29: B-Sides
Destroying lives one bad review at a time
A new monthly series in which we deep-dive into a few disastrous Airbnb reviews to see what went wrong and who started it.
PSA: No Airbnbs were slandered in the making of this post. Out of respect for owners’ privacy and their revenue-generating efforts, B-Sides is purely a celebration of the creative rage that fuels Airbnb guests and hosts worldwide.
This week, I struggled to find juicy hateful reviews. It seemed like hosts were doing a great job and guests were satisfied. This should be good news - I want everyone on Airbnb to succeed because I love Airbnb listings. But alas, I am here to entertain you, so I was disappointed not to find more seething reviews and all-caps rants.
Yes, the usual culprits wreaked havoc. Moldy walls. Cockroaches in the cupboards. Unsurprisingly, these issues were most common at lower price points. As the saying goes, don't expect embroidered slippers when all you can afford is a hostel. What once again stood out, however, were the bad reviews that provoked swift retaliation.
It’s clear that the “customer is always right" philosophy does not apply to Airbnb. It’s vicious out there. Armed with swords and shields, hosts stand ready to defend their income.
This got me thinking about the gig economy and the power of those little gold stars. A fantastic stay with warm hospitality, homemade treats, and metaphorical hugs will nurture your inner child. You are loved, you are wanted, you are respected. Your money was well spent. FIVE STARS. But if things go south and you feel abandoned or accused… how far are you willing to go?
I present to you, the drama:
Today’s first review is an excellent example of concise disappointment. The worst kind, if you ask me:
“Absolute waste of money waste of time our whole entire weekend was absolutely ruined.”
I want to know more but sadly I can’t request that information so I will move on.
This one was fascinating:
“The place was great, except after the first night's stay, my Aunt’s sandals came up missing and never turned in to lost and found, and the 2nd night we stayed the fridge water and ice didn't work but they brought up ice trays and a bag of ice. which was nice. the only issue I had truly was the sandals.”
Maybe you made it up. No big deal. If you did, I applaud your creativity. You didn’t just leave a review; you wrote fiction. I dare even call you a poet, traveling the globe and planting little verbal landmines across the fields of the world wide web.
This next review felt more like a morning journal entry than a review.
The mentality of a host is so clearly defined just by how their house is presented to you.
Do they genuinely care about your stay or are they just in it for the money, do they strive to ensure u have a pleasant stay or is “good enough” their motto until u say something while all along hoping u won’t and doing nothing until u do?
How old are the pics or when was the house last maintenanced since the photo shoot?
Is the exterior groomed or is there more weeds than anything else?
Can U have a nice experience in the kitchen or will you dread the kitchen because of how poorly it is set up for your stay? Do U even dare having your boss or in-laws 4 dinner or do U first need to run to the store 4 a set of knives that will slice a tomato or a steak? Or a cutting board that isn’t warped w/ the wood splitting and splintering. Or 4 matching silverware
And the beds? Can the host sleep comfortably night after night?
What is the definition of Hospitality? Choose wisely is my advice
Well, which was it? Was it good? Was it bad? Are you upset? Are you guilty? Enough with all the questions!
Thankfully the host stepped in to provide more clarity:
“This couple overstay at my house for 4 days! They took advantage of the convenience of Airbnb during the peak season of Christmas and New Year to check in a 4-bedroom single-family house for $32 through false descriptions and exaggerated performances!”
It’s quite obvious what happened here: you needed to impress an employer and some in-laws around the holidays, so you rented a nice house on Airbnb to pretend it was your own and then realized you were short on time and underprepared, had to run to the store to buy steak knives and matching silverware, ran out of money, asked the Airbnb host for a refund and I think you got away with it! Class act.
But it’s not nice. It’s rude.
It breaks my heart when a guest never got to step foot in their dream vacation rental:
I booked this apartment, didn't get any information about the check-in, I waited until 12 o'clock in the night, didn't get an answer and had to look for another apartment, the money was gone, no response.
This person wrote a beautiful poem:
Surroundings had come down.
Ants in the kitchen. Toilet totally loose.
Damage in the apartment, e.g. sink and doors.
Beds partially completely worn out.
A picture well painted. It’s like I was there!
Key learnings: Do your research, keep track of your sandals, and make sure you say lots of kind things to your hosts and your guests. Words of affirmation go a long way. It’s a harsh world out there.